Sunday, 4 May 2014

People are so naive about abusive relationships!

My view is, if you haven't been in an abusive relationship, then you have no right to negatively comment on the actions of the victims. You can't possibly know how it feels to be a victim in an abusive relationship. You can't understand the gradual mind control that plays a huge part in not leaving the person. You don't know how lovely abusers are in the beginning until you fall in love with them and falling in love with them makes you want to stay and try to fix them.

Men have said they wouldn't date a woman who had been in a string of abusive relationships. What a slap in the face that is! I'd be ashamed and upset if a guy refused to date me because of my past relationships and their terrible assumptions of abuse victims being weak and wanting to be treated like shit? Yeah, guys think women want to be treated like shit, that's why they stay and find other abusive partners. How dumb can people get? Turning down a victim of abusive relationships is like turning down a rape victim for being raped. Imagine the pain you'd cause the woman who was hopeful of getting her life on track with a new guy who'd show her the way guys are meant to treat women, only to be turned down because she's a rape victim!

People have said some really shitty things about abuse victims; we're dumb, weak, stupid, naive etc. All the stereotypes. I'm in fact, a very strong and fairly confident person who got caught up in an abusive relationship. To be honest, I never knew they existed. I was never told about them which is where we fail as a society. Fuck the numerous drug talks in school, try replacing one of those drug talks with an abusive relationship talk. Tell girls in particular, the behaviour they should spot in a boyfriend which shows their behaviour/relationship isn't healthy. That would make a huge difference and it could've possibly saved me from being fucked up from my last relationship.

People need to be more aware and definitely more educated about abusive relationships, even more so if they've never been in one just so they can refrain from something truly offensive to a victim, either purposely or not.

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